The Red Circle

The Long Good Friday 007: Incredible Non-Bond Performances by The Best James Bonds.

By Tom Nix

Sean Connery in The Man Who Would Be King

Believe it or not, there was actually a time when Sean Connery played neither James Bond nor Sean Connery. Sure, its impossible to fully disguise his renound Scottish Brogue, but all of that Conneriness dissipates just a little in John Huston’s incredible The Man Who Would Be King. Playing Danny Dravot, an ex-British soldier (along with Michael Caine) who end up in the middle east looking for adventure. Sean Connery, as is normal for him, is mistaken for a god. They use this misunderstanding to rob the ethnic people blind. The problem is, Danny Dravot starts to believe his own hype.

It’s not a masterful performance, but it certainly showcases Connery’s power as an actor. He controls every scene he is in, and plays a character with true, honest humanity. This is a far cry from the perfect man of James Bond. He’s an imperfect man inhabiting a perfect being’s body – at least for a while.

Pierce Brosnan in The Matador

Brosnan is probably better in this film than he has been in anything in his entire career. He plays a slightly loopy hitman at the end of his rope who is struggling to get out of his depressing, difficult and dangerous career. After a chance meeting with Greg Kinnear at a Mexico City bar (where Brosnan’s Julian Noble has just balked on a job due to nerves), the two form an awkward, but mutually beneficial friendship.

Julian Noble is a fantastic character – a wealthy, pompous man who has finally hit the brick wall of partial insanity. the man kills for a living and all that nonsense has caught up with him in his mid-40’s. Despite being an excellent film (and kind of a comedy at that!) about the unglamorous and unfulfilling side of being a professional hitman, The Matador will forever be a minor classic because of the just-barely-enough quirk it throws into a movie about a man who hates his job. Of killing people. Plus: An Irony Free Pierce Brosnan in a speedo and cowboy boots. It’s a performance to savor, and its a shame it received as little notice as it did.

Timothy Dalton in Hot Fuzz

There are almost no words for how incredible Dalton is in this movie. A megamart manager in a small town, Dalton’s Simon Skinner may also be the culprit behind the horrifying string of murders happening in the idyllic village of Sandford. There’s no point in discussing this film here – it’s truly one of the best films of the decade – so let’s just focus on every level of awesome Timothy Dalton hits.

It would be embarrassing to say that middle-aged Dalton was made for middle-management. But, Simon Skinner is the absolute pinnacle of smarmy condescension and elitism. He sinks into this role completely. Every mannerism, every tic, every line of dialogue is one of the best in the film – and it’s entirely because of Dalton. It’s incredible that the film’s parody of  the “evil corporation bad guy” is the manager of a grocery. But, in the small towns of rural England, there are few people more suited to the role. He is probably the most memorable thing about a religiously memorable film. He also gets the luxury of participating in one of the most aggressively violent non-death scenes in the movies. Hot Fuzz is a masterpiece, and Simon Skinner is Tim Dalton’s masterpiece in turn. Bonus: To wrap it all up, be sure to check out the bonus features for Simon Pegg and Nick Frost acting out – yep, you guessed it – Sean Connery and Michael Caine from The Man Who Would Be King.

SPECIAL MENTION: George Lazenby in The Man From Hong Kong.

A pretty much impossible to find film – it was only featured in a segment of Not Quite Hollywood, a documentary on the insane Australian Ozploitation flicks of the 70’s and 80’s – The movie sees a martial arts expert sent on a mission to stop George Lazenby’s evil deeds. What makes it worthwhile – Oh, you know. Only the fact that Lazenby GETS SET ON FIRE IN THIS. Good luck tracking this one down. We recommend a rental of the documentary instead. It’s probably a better film.

BOND ON FIRE

What’s Your Favorite Bond Performance (Non-Bond)?

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